Some couples only want to have one child whereas others want to have four or five kids, or even more. However, sometimes things can change as far as that goes.
There are those couples who believed that they were one and done but are changing their minds and have a strong urge to bring in another baby whereas there are others who wanted four kids but are quite happy to be stopping at three kids. There is always a time when mom says she doesn’t want any more babies.
Why Does Mom Not Want To Have Any More Babies?
There are many reasons that couples would want to stop bringing in more babies who wanted large families originally but only wanted to stop at two kids at the end. Reasons such as finances, the mother’s mental health, and wellbeing, low threshold for stress, or having a child with special needs are some reasons that families stay small even though the intention was to have it large.
And, there are signs to look for whenever the mother especially (and the father would have to, in the end, be in agreement) is done with having any more babies.
The Idea Of Another Pregnancy Is Cringeworthy
This even goes for moms who had decent pregnancies. If they have school-aged kids and hate the idea of going through another pregnancy, then that is a sign that these moms are done. Again, even if they had good experiences with previous pregnancies, the truth is that it tires anyone out.
That means between having to take their kids to school and to extracurricular activities while they are fatigued from being pregnant is not a pleasant thought to many moms.
I mean I can say that I personally could not imagine being pregnant while dealing with school issues that kids face. Especially back a decade ago when I had one typical kid dealing with elementary school drama with an uncooperative teacher.
Then I had the other kid with autism and ADHD which meant having to deal with a lot of behaviors from him as well as therapies and so on. Being pregnant while dealing with all of that is unimaginable to me. Besides I was struggling with depression which would be a recipe for disaster if the pregnancy was in the picture.
Mom Is Giving Away Baby Stuff
If the mom is starting to clear out the home and is taking bags to place baby clothes, toys, and blankets into it so they can be sent away to donation – or to a family member or friend that is expecting, that is a sign that she is done and done.
If she was planning to have more babies, then why would she be giving away baby clothes and toys?
Life Is Enjoyable At The Moment
The kids are getting older and they are gaining their independence, and life is good. Why rock the boat when things are smooth sailing but at the same time are chaotic due to having kids getting older and maturing as each stage brings challenges. Even with that said, life is still great because time with the family is enjoyed, and vacations are great, and there is no room for another baby.
The Idea Of More Chaos Is Cringeworthy
A new baby only brings chaos and that is not something that some moms want, and have their plates full as it is with the kids they already have. However, some moms embrace it and that is why they want to expand their families. But that is not the same for every mom. Some of them have limits set lower than others.
The Freedom Is Returning
As kids get older (unless they have significant special needs which is why my son now lives in a residential school and group home and is so much better off) that means the more and more freedom the parents get back.
And once the parents get a taste of what they had before they brought kids into the picture which is more freedom, then they love it and relish it.
That also means the older that the kids become, the more freedom that mom and dad will keep getting back, and eventually, they will have as much freedom as they did before kids came into the picture. And the feeling of freedom coming back can start as early as the youngest child being old enough to be babysat by a high schooler.
There Are No Feelings Of Jealousy When It Comes To Your Pregnant Friends
Those who want to keep expanding their families will be happy for their friends that are pregnant but at the same time will feel envious. However, if the mom is not in the least bit envious that a friend of hers is pregnant, then that could be a sign right there that she is done with having kids. if anything, she may feel sorry for her friend for dealing with the discomforts that pregnancy brings.
Birth Control Is Tight
The one thing that parents who no longer want kids worry about how reliable their birth control happens to be. That means moms that are done will go and get a tubal ligation or even their tubes removed, or the dad will be the volunteer and have a vasectomy.
From what I have heard is that tubal ligations become less effective as time elapses. That means there are stories of surprise pregnancies happening about a decade after the procedure. Luckily that never happened to me but that is a real worry.
That means if you happen to have these signs and you are still wondering if there could be kids in the future, then that likely really is not the case! I have to admit that there is a small part of me that does regret not going for a third.
However, I was also afraid of having another child with special needs and I could not even cope with one. The most important thing to do is to never ask any mom if she is planning on having any more kids, even if she only has one child. Everyone has a story and a reason for doing things. And those things are not always your business whatsoever.